There’s a great coachable moment

You may say “Hey, next time you get that same ball, what’s one word or one feeling that helps to get extra height or help you get the spin that you needed to create?”

And

“Can you summarize that in one word or one feeling?”

and

“Can you tell me in your own words exactly, precisely or specifically?”

I (Emma) love those words because when a player walks out onto the court and you ask, what are your strengths? And they say: “Oh, I don’t know, forehand or something like that”.

That typical teenager 12 to 15 age sort of response. Whereas if you say, can you tell me what specifically about your forehand makes it a weapon for you, then they’ve got to peel back the layers of the onion or you as the coach, you keep asking that question to peel back and get to the core of what the forehand does. When I move around and hit my insideout forehand with shape, what it does is it pushes the other player off the court and then it creates that opportunity for me to transition to the net. For example, if that’s my style of play.

I (Emma) got really quite burned out from coaching tennis. I couldn’t understand that I was only relating to half of my players. How was it possible that I could bring out the best in these players and not in those. I wasn’t quite sure why. After studing emotional intelligence and Neurolinguistic programming (NLP) I found the concept of coaching someone without being aloud to tell them the answer. All of a sudden it’s about asking the question that unlocks the learning within the player.

I highly recommend that tennis coches try for fun to have a lesson where they are not allowed to give direct commands. It’s really difficult.

Sir John Whitmore belives that it’s more important what goes on inside the head than what goes on outside, inspired by the Inner Game of tennis. When I heard about that I started exploring how to unlock the learning from within by questioning the players.

When I then got back to tennis I had from previous tactical and technical concepts, but I now also had tools around communication.

I started noticing when I used past- and future based questions.

Noticing that players would shut down when I said: “Why did you miss that ball?”

The player will then tell you a long list of reasons to justify why they missed the shot. As a coach you will nod at their answer, but that only cements what they did wrong – that doesn’t help them with what to do differently next time.

The minute you ask the player a future based question you point their attention towards the future and what to do.

My all-time favorite tip is the 2 words: “Next time”. “Hey, next time you have got that same ball…”. The future based question allows the players to move on and think about the future rather than dwelling on the mistake they just did.

You have to ask great questions. Asking great questions starts from the point of curiosity about the learner.

Remember that power of the pause.

Take care of the filler words, you can show your passion in other ways.

Another tip when working with introverted players really need to think. Sometimes the learning doesn’t sink in until the next day or the next lesson. So, I (Emma) love the question “When the time is right for you, can you come back to me with a way that you could describe that in your own words” and then when they’re ready, there’s real beauty in that as well.

One type of question to avoid is what I call memory recall question. So, a coach will say “Hey, make sure you turn before the ball bounces. That’s absolutely fantastic coaching instruction. The coach would then say: “Hey, remember, what you have got to do by the time the ball passes? And the players correctly remember “Turn” but oftentimes all the player is simply recalling what you said without them unlocking the learning and problem solving when the shoulders need to be turned in relation to the bounce of the ball as in as an example.

Another type of question to consider carefully is Why questions. Why questions are fantastic after a positive experience or the player having done something really well. But the minute you say “Why did you throw your racket?” or “Why did you behave that way?” – especially teenage kids will deny it.

They will go: “I didn’t throw the racquet three times.” They’ll justify it. “Oh, well, he made a bad line call or annoyed me” or “Well, my favorite player throws his racquet, so why can’t I?”. So, it’s downward rabbit hole spiral. Just be mindful of it.

For parents, I’d (Peter) like to mention an example.

Roger Federer’s parents, they never got involved.

They helped us and asked us if we needed something.

They were there for me and Roger, if we could sleep overnight in their house in between tournaments, they would make a nice dinner and then we would leave for the next tournament.

Roger’s mom would wash our clothes and help us be ready for the next tournament.

That’s tennis parents, the real ones, in my opinion.

To me (Peter) being a tennis parents is not about how many tournaments you have to play and all that.

Q: So, playing on the on clay and that being good for you, do you also feel like the indoor courts that has been slowed down and also the balls that are bigger and slower now, do you think that’s good for the development of players?

Yes and no.

The balls are heavier, so that equals more injuries on arms, elbows and wrists.

Everybody’s hitting the ball so hard these days with the different string material compared to earlier.

On the other hand, I think it’s good for us to watch tennis on a slower court for sure.

It was boring to watch Stockholm open from 1980 in the Global Arena where basically we were playing on ice.

That was no fun for the spectators.

So, I think that’s much better for spectators now, but the balls I don’t think it’s so good for the players.

Clay is great for tennis players.

I wish I (Peter) would have played more on clay even if that had meant that I would have lost more matches.

Because when you go to hard court, from clay it’s so much easier to play tennis.

When you go from grass to hard court.

You are so bad afterwards on hard courts.

So as much as you can play on clay because it’s good for you.

First of all, if you have been a player, you have to cut the string, you’re done, it’s over. Your tennis career is over. I think a lot of coaches have a problem with that. They cannot see, “OK, it’s over”.

…but it is.

Use all the experiences and all the mistakes you did. That’s a good start. If you haven’t been a player, if you have another background to be a coach, then it’s totally different.

In my (Peter) case, I tried to listen a lot to the players. It’s an advantage having been a player at a certain level, because you can you think a little bit like them and that’s a good thing.

When that is said, when I (Peter) work with somebody, I don’t have a line that this is the way it should be. You always have to see who you work with. Some players need more practice, some need more quality and less practice.

Q: Have your viewpoint changed on how parents should be involved in their kid’s tennis journey after you’ve become a parent yourself?

Yeah, of course.

I get reminded every single day as a coach. It doesn’t matter what level it is.

I lived in the states 10 years and I worked with decent players, bad players, and then you see parents who want it more than the kids and that is very sad for me to see. It’s a problem that the parents want too much and want to get involved and tell the coach. I had so many times a parent come up to me and say: “My son needs to work on this and this.”

I said, “Listen, sit down and I’ll have a look and see what I think.”

Then the parents became quieter. But that’s how you have to act. You just have to say, hey. You took a lesson from me, so sit down. You know, it’s very common around the world that the parents are too involved.

Q: Have you found that changing over the years that the parents have become more involved or at least wanting to be more involved?

Yes, definitely. I believe a big reason is the money involved, which then makes the parents getting involved, too. They want their kid to be good and be making money. And, that’s the way it is. And it doesn’t matter what sport it is. Some money is always involved in the big sports, like tennis. So, parents are more involved. That’s just way it is.

It’s very hard. That was the hard part for me (Peter), especially with Roger (red. Federer), because we did so many weeks together. We did 40 weeks. So basically, I had a relationship with him because I spent so much time with him. Further he was a kid when I worked with him. He was going from being kind of young in his mind outside the court growing into a man. So, it was a lot of work outside the court and also on court of course.

It was easy with Marat (Red. Safin) because by then he was more a man, so I didn’t have to focus so much on him as a person. It was strictly business. I didn’t travel as extensively with him as I did with Roger, so I had some time with my family.

Q: If you could provide yourself with an advice with what you know now, what would that be?

Don’t do too many weeks in a row. It’s hard to be away from the family for 5-6 weeks. It’s very, very hard. I prefer going away for 3 weeks and then have a block of 2 weeks at home and then go away again. Leading up to Grand Slam, you have to do a month. But in between the slams you have to have some breaks. 1 week is not enough as you come home, and you land. You feel all right. It’s nice to be home and then you have to go again. If you have 2 or 3 weeks at home, then you feel more like you can relax a little bit and take care of the family and do things together, because 1 week it’s simply too little.